Lead w Love pt 1

Bishop Tom Berlin preached a sermon at Ft. Pierce First UMC.  The title was "lead with love."  You can guess what it was about.

When I think about leading with love, I think of many things.  First of all I think of the idea of actually seeing other people.  See the person taking your order at Taco Bell as a person.  See the other drivers not as enemy combatants but as people.  See the person that you disagree with as a person that God loves.

We cannot lead with love if we don't SEE other people.  Lead with love.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Tried your best

Coldplay sang, "when you try your best but you don't succeed."  I think that we have all had the experience of trying to do a thing or make something happen and it just doesn't work out as you planned.

In those moments I would say, keep trying to do the good.  Don't stop believing.  Doing the good is worth pursuing even when we fail a time or two, or 3.

You have never really failed until you quit.  Don't quit.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

make it last

After Charlie Kirk's murder I was watching the news.  The news anchor had a couple of US congressmen on.  They were from different sides of the aisle, but they are good friends.  They are among the few who are committed to working together for the betterment of the country.

The news anchor compared the feelings that many have now with how people felt after 9-11. 

General feelings of How could this happen?  And a general quiet, calm and coming together...

The anchor mentioned that after 9-11, the peaceful good feelings lasted for about a month.  She asked the two congressmen what could be done to keep the cooperation and kindness going.

I have an answer to that.  Here I go:  

Somehow in America a culture of hate and division has been created.  How about we stop reporting when a politician says something hateful.  How about you don't get news coverage if you bash people.  How about instead of modeling division, the news media holds up those who are kind.

Maybe something would change.

I know that no one in the news will ever read this, but I will tell  you my friends that we can create culture in our homes, in our work places and anywhere that we go.  Those who choose negative, destructive behavior should not be promoted.  We need to model kindness and uphold healthy behavior.  

You can, I can create and sustain positive culture one person, one day, one moment at a time.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

On the death of Charlie Kirk

I was going to write something about the murder of this man, but my friend Wendy Minshal wrote some great words.  She is one of the most kind people that I know.  She is the pastor of the Peculiar UMC in Peculiar MO.

Here is part of what she posted on Facebook:

I can’t sleep, my mind Is spinning, and my heart aches.
I want the hate to stop. I want there to be peace on earth, in our country, in our communities, churches, families, homes. I want peace for the human heart.
I don’t want someone’s (ANYONE’s!) death celebrated. I don’t want school shootings (or ANY violent death/attack) ignored.
It doesn’t matter who’s to blame for the division, or the way hate has manifested in the human heart… It matters that we stop it.
It MATTERS what we say… how we act… the empathy we feel AND the empathy we withhold- It ALL matters.

Sometimes it is hard to see the good. But this is still our father's world, and there is still much good to see.

still mad

Something happened the other day that I am still mad about.  I woke up the day after and I was still mad.  That is unusual.  I get mad, but I don't stay mad.  And it is rare that I don't sleep off a mad.

But this person won the award.  What they said to me was so hurtful and ridiculous!!!

This person is not a blog reader.  We have helped them more over the years than any other person in any church that I have been involved with.

Some people are just detached from reality.

The moral of this story is this:  Keep being good to people, regardless of how they respond to you.  Keep working on forgiving.  The mad will eventually go away.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

a bigger picture

My friend Terry wrote in and said this, "Can you see a bigger picture? That question alone draws me closer to God."

I would add... can you see a picture besides the one that shows up conveniently in your head? Are you open to ideas that are outside of yourself?

When we choose to look past our preconceived notions, it always draws us closer to reality and to God.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

The Zoo

Last Friday I went to the zoo with my daughter Allison and her children, my grandchildren:  Bella age 5 and Cruz age 2 1/2.

How long has it been since I was at the zoo?  Probably since my children were young.... 25 years anyway.   Well, the Melbourne Florida zoo is awesome.

Lots of shade, lots of animals that you can see, a train ride and lots of children's activities.

We were told that this is a very nice giraffe.
Willing to stick his neck out for anyone.

 Just Lion around.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a 
Rhino???  Elephino.

Baby Zebra

Babe, Paul Bunyan's Ox.

On display now through Thanksgiving!!!

Bella watches the Bear eat.

Two lovely bald eagles.  Both left flightless
after accidents.  Very nice to see.

lots of hungry carp.

Bobcat.  Don't let your domestic cats outside in Florida.

Flamingos think they are smart.  
They are always trying to get a leg up on you.

Alli w Cruz and Bella.  Flamingos for background singers.

We had a blast!!!

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

favorite songs

I believe that it is my buddy John M who used to or still does have music parties with friends.  He would invite 3 buddies over, each one bringing a number of songs to share.  Then the group would sit and listen to each other's songs and drink ice tea.

I always thought that this was a fantastic idea.  Sometimes now when friends come to visit, we sit around the table, tell stories and ask Alexa to play our favorite songs.

If I went to such a party at your house, I could bring many many songs.  But if I had to choose 4, here are four that come to my mind today.

1.  Meatloaf - 2 out of 3 ain't bad

2.  ELO - All over the world

3.  Coldplay - Viva la vida

4.  Brooks and Dunn - Neon Moon

I would love to hear what some of your 4 favorites are.  And please don't say, "anything Chicago" give me some specific songs.

I love music.  It is amazing.  It is a gift from God.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

from my brother John... and sermon link

Fear is "what if"
Faith is "even if"

I love that.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

click here to listen to or watch Sunday's sermon.

sermon 9-7-2025

Who moved my cheese?

Who moved my cheese is a 1998 book by Spencer Johnson. In the book he outlines 4 responses to change...

In the story, two mice and two "little people" — people the size of mice — live in a maze. The mice, named Sniff and Scurry, are simpleminded and instinctive; they run the same path every day, eating cheese when they find it, but are always ready to move on. The littlepeople, Hem and Haw, search for a special kind of Cheese that makes them happy and fulfilled by keeping track of where they have found it before. All four discover a spot where their favorite cheese is regularly available, called Cheese Station C. The mice continue to run the entire maze each day while the littlepeople stop exploring and settle at Cheese Station C.

One day the supply at Cheese Station C is exhausted. The mice accept that there is no more cheese and continue their running path. The littlepeople sit at the station confused and upset. Hem protests that there ought to be Cheese, and Haw wonders where the mice have gone. Meanwhile, the mice find new supply of cheese at Cheese Station N. The littlepeople remain at Cheese Station C for several days, growing frustrated and hungry. Eventually Haw accepts that running the maze is the only way he will ever have Cheese again, faces his fear of moving on, and leaves Hem behind.

Haw finds crumbs of Cheese scattered around the maze and some other Cheese Stations that are already depleted. He returns to Cheese Station C and tells Hem there is other Cheese, but Hem refuses to budge. Haw continues exploring, writing observations about his journey on the walls of the maze, until he arrives at Cheese Station N which is stocked with all kinds of Cheese.

Haw reflects on the lessons he has learned and hopes that Hem will finally let go of his doubts. On the wall of Cheese Station N, he writes several lessons that change is inevitable and keeping up with it is the only way to continue having Cheese. 

Lessons for life...

1. Anticipate change: Be ready for the cheese to move.
2. Adapt quickly: The quicker you let go of old cheese, the sooner you can enjoy new cheese.
3. Change: Move with the cheese.
4. Enjoy change: Savor the adventure and the taste of new cheese.
5. Be ready to change quickly and enjoy it again: The cheese will keep moving.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Bad feeling

Last Sunday I walked into church and I had a bad feeling. I wasn't ready. I wasn't feeling it. This happens sometimes and it is not a good feeling. It's like you know there will be people hoping to get something in worship, and you feel like you have nothing to give.

I sat on the front row and prayed. Then I remembered this story.

The village priest was a holy man so each time the people were in trouble they had recourse to him. He would then withdraw to a special place in the forest and say a special prayer. God would always hear his prayer and the village would be helped.

When he died and the people were in trouble they had recourse to his successor who was not a holy man but knew the secret of the special place in the forest and the special prayer. So he said, “Lord, you know I am not a holy man. But surely you are not going to hold that against my people? So listen to my prayer and come to our assistance.” And God would hear his prayer and the village would be helped.

When he too died and the people were in trouble they had recourse to his successor who knew the special prayer but not the place in the forest. So he said, “What do you care for places, Lord? Is not every place made holy by your presence? So listen to my prayer and come to our assistance.” And once again God would hear his prayer and the village would be helped.

Now he too died and when the people were in trouble they had recourse to his successor who did not know the special prayer or the special place in the forest. So he said, “It isn’t the formula that you value, Lord, but the cry of the heart in distress. So listen to my prayer and come to our assistance.” And once again God would hear his prayer and the village would be helped.

After this man died when the people were in trouble they had recourse to his successor. Now this priest had more use for money than for prayer. So he would say to God, “What sort of a God are you that while you are perfectly capable of solving problems that you yourself have caused, you still refuse to lift a finger until you have us cringe and beg and plead? Well, you can do as you please with the people.” Then he would go right back to whatever business he had in hand. And, once again, God would hear his prayer and the village would be helped.

I am glad that God is available and helpful even when we feel unable or unworthy.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

thoughts from a friend, about friendship...

I recently had the joy of reconnecting with a person I worked with 44 years ago. What a blessing. This person is retired and lives in your state of Florida, and is going to come see me in a couple of weeks. We visit online every day.

What I have discovered is that people's personal traits most often don't change a lot, even over that many years. We continue to be who we are, and often the way we were shaped during our upbringing.

This person has the same values as when we worked together:

• Honesty
• Integrity
• Thriftiness
• Outgoingness
• A strong and active faith in God

Needless to say, I am very excited to see this person.

Jeff comments... how lovely to have friends that you are excited to see. I love visiting my KC friends. I also look forward to going to church both at Ft. Pierce and Oceanview. I enjoy going into the office to work at Ocean View. Great people there. It is a joy to have friends and know good people.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

be thankful

I was visited by a woman who has a sick child.  An adult child.  She has already buried two of her other children.  She has also buried 4 of her brothers and sisters.

We prayed for her.  We prayed for her daughter.  We prayed for healing.

And she told me this... "what ever is going on with your kids that you are worried about, just be thankful that you still have them."

Please say a prayer for my friend and her daughter.  Thank you.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Fear and Greed

 The other day I got to catch up with my friend Scott Connors.  Scott is a financial planner, and a very good man.  He told me something that I thought was interesting...

"Most people make their decisions based on fear and greed."

Well of course, that makes sense in the financial world.  Fear of losing, fear of not having enough, greed for more.

But as I got to thinking about it, I think that many decisions in life, even outside the world of investments are highly influenced by fear and greed.

I am afraid I may lose that person.  I am afraid to be alone.  I am afraid of aging.  And so sometimes we act out of our fears.

I want.  I want more.  I am going to take it.  I can never have enough.  Greed spills over into every day life.

What if instead of fear and greed, we started to think more about faith and trust.  Faith and trust.  

Faith and trust.  Everything is ok.  We are fine.  We have enough.  God is with us and will take care of us.  A subtle shift in our thinking can change so much of how we feel about a day.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Short Cut and sermon link

So I was in the Kansas City airport on Saturday.  The airport was not very busy.  I got my bags checked and headed for security.

Although there were very few people there, the TSA security had all of the back and forth stanchions set up.  Back and forth, back and forth, for no reason.

I did not want to go back and forth.  There were no people in line.  I decided to take a short cut.  I saw a spot where the barrier was sagging low, very low.  I knew that I could easily step over it and save myself 100s of steps.  [can you see what is about to happen???]

Sometimes short cuts are not the way to go.

My right foot went over the barrier... my left foot caught the fabric belt.  I was surprised.  And then suddenly I was going down.  My entire body lurched and jerked to avoid the fall.

A couple of Clear employees came to check on me.  I was ok.  Sort of.  I pulled my quad and tweaked my left shoulder.  Now, because I wanted to save a few steps, my body will ache for a few weeks.

Sometimes short cuts are not the way to go.  Sometimes the easy way is not the easy way.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

If you are interested in listening to/watching the sermon from Sunday, here is the link

Click here for sermon from 8-31

Goodbye

Last week I had to say good bye to my Kansas City friends. It was sad. There were tears. I love them and I miss them all so much.

I’ll see many of them again in October when I go back for Woods Chapel UMC’s 50th anniversary celebration.

I guess it’s better to have friends and miss them, than to have no one in your life that is special.

So if you have people that you miss, be thankful for the friendship that is shared between you.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

The Next Human

Who is the next person that you will see?  A family member?  A server at a restaurant?  Another driver?  A co-worker?  Stop right now and think of that person.

How will you treat them?  Will they be treated as a stranger or a friend?  Will you really "see" them?  Will you show them kindness?

The kingdom comes, we take over the world, one day, one moment at a time.

Send me a story and tell me about the next person that you meet today and how that encounter went.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Proper apologies

Sign seen recently at a Jimmy Johns...

Proper apologies have three parts:

1.  What I did was wrong.

2.  I feel badly that I hurt you.

3.  How can I make this better?

Then of course, actually doing the thing to make it better.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

It's still about me

We humans default to: "it's about me."

When I make it about me and what I want, it is never healthy.  When I make it about me, the greater good always takes a hit.

I must remember that the story is bigger than me and my wants and the picture is bigger than me and what I can see.

Stop and think and be honest with yourself.   Can you see the bigger picture?

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

We just disagree

Dave Mason sang a song...

Been away, haven't seen you in a while
How've you been, have you changed your style?
And do you think that we've grown up differently?
Don't seem the same, seems you've lost your feel for me

[Chorus]
So let's leave it alone, 'cause we can't see eye to eye
There ain't no good guy, there ain't no bad guy
There's only you and me and we just disagree
Ooh-hoo-hoo, oh-oh-ho

[Verse 2]
I'm going back to a place that's far away
How bout you, have you got a place to stay? you,

Why should I care, when I'm just trying to get along?
We were friends, but now it's the end of our love song

[Chorus]
So let's leave it alone, 'cause we can't see eye to eye
There ain't no good guy, there ain't no bad guy
There's only you and me and we just disagree
Ooh-hoo-hoo, oh-oh-ho

Sometimes friends, we just disagree.  Good people, two sides of an argument.  

Let's just move on and agree to disagree.  I still love you and I hope that you still love me.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

transformers

Power comes from the power lines to our homes.  Along the way there is a transformer that reduces the power to where it is usable in our homes.  High voltage is reduced to a much lower voltage.  That makes everything work in the home.   Send the high voltage straight in, like in a lightening strike and everything is fried.

When organizations are under stress,  some folks become high voltage.  Complaining, unhappy and negative.  

Churches need transformers. Organizations of all kinds need transformers.  Families need transformers.   These are people who do not get excited by change, bad news, or difficult situations.  They take worry in stride.  They have learned in life how to take the moments that seem to be terminal and make them palatable.  Relational transformers calm the storm.  They make the energy usable for the entire organization.

How about you.  Are you raising the voltage or are you transforming it into something that can be used for the good of the whole?

The world needs less reactors and more transformers.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

bad story

I know a painful story.  It has come into my world in a surprising way.  I have struggled with it for years.  It would be very easy to let this story dominate me.

But I am not going to let this story become my story.  While I have every sympathy for the situation, I cannot let it take over my life.

If we let bad news eat our lunch, and we can, then we are no good for our friends, no good for our family, no good for ourselves and no good for God.

We need to push off the bad news and focus on the good.  There is too much good to see, there is too much love to give to allow hurtful things to dominate our lives.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

First Day

Last Monday was the first day of Kindergarten for my 5 year old granddaughter Bella.  She was excited.  Mom was in tears.  We sent clothes.

By the way, our Grandma and Grandpa names are Ci Ci and Pooh. 😄😀😊

They made a sign for her to hold....

She doesn't want the sign.  She says, I got this!!!

Mom is gonna cry

It is three blocks to school.  Dad is "walking" here there.

They wondered all day how her first day was going.  When they picked her up at the end of the day, she was happy as a bee.  She didn't want to leave.

I wanted to share these pictures with  you.  It makes me happy to see her growing up and doing well.

It is nice to have happy things in our lives.  Next week they will be in Florida for a visit.  Very exciting!!!

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

compassion fatigue

I hate compassion fatigue but it is a real thing.

Compassion fatigue is what you feel after you watch one too many commercials for starving children.  Or one too many commercials about animals that need to be rescued.

I am experiencing it over the war in Ukraine.  I have very negative feelings towards Putin.  I hate what he is doing.  I want to read about what is going on with the war, but after a while, it just gets exhausting.

Part of what is difficult about all of these issues is that we have a feeling of powerlessness.  I can't change Ukraine or Gaza.  I can't feed all the children.  I can't rescue all the dogs.

When we allow compassion fatigue to win, we easily become those who put on our rose colored glasses and slip into our comfortable American lifestyle.  Kind of a "I can't fix it, so forget it."

We must remember this, "just because we cannot do everything, does not mean that we should not do something."

Fight compassion fatigue.  Care about what matters in the world.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

take a deep breath

Sometimes it feels like the world around you is going crazy.  Or at least the world around me is going crazy.  Things happen that I don't understand, things happen that I don't like.

It is easy to react.  It is easy to buck up.  It is easy to complain.  In fact, this is the response that way to many humans make.  When something happens that we don't like most humans get unhappy because the world is not aligning itself to make me happy.

There is another way.  It is the way of Jesus.  When he was hurt, he did not hurt back.  When he was insulted, he did not retaliate.  He simply entrusted himself to his Father.

I think that we would all surely find more peace in life if we worried less about circumstances and simply rested in God.

It's not that hard.  Take a deep breath.  He is right here.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

More Ducks

In our neighborhood we have lots of different kinds of ducks.  This is a Muskogee Duck with her latest waddling of ducks.

So cute, so amazing to see.  If there are 11 today, next week there will be 8, the next week 5 and so on.  And somewhere there is a fox getting fat.

I think ducks are cool.  I'm not a fan of foxes or bobcats.  But I guess they all play a role in God's big beautiful world.

There are parts of the world that we like and parts that we don't.  We have to learn to enjoy what we like and understand the parts that we don't.

Life is one constant lesson of me learning to get over myself, and what I do and don't prefer.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Permission giving

Permission Giving

I get questions from time to time about what is a permission giving church.  For the last 15 years that I was at Woods Chapel in Lees Summit, we ran a permission giving system.

Many organizations operate in a top down fashion. The board or CEO decides the priorities and those priorities trickle down to the rank and file. The problem with this in the church is that people end up doing ministry because someone else decided what they should be doing.

In a permission giving church, people are taught to hear God's call. Everyone is called by God. What is God calling you to do? Staff and leaders then, simply help direct and launch what others feel called to do, helping them to take responsibility for, and lead their ministry.

In a traditional church organization, people want to dump their ministry ideas on the church members and the church budget.  In a permission giving system, people who are called to a ministry must manage and demonstrate 3 [three] things:

1.  does this ministry fit our mission?  Does it show or share God's love in some way?

2.  Who will do it?  The person presenting the idea must build their own team.  They must take responsibility to find the folks to join them in the endeavor.  

3.  Funding... people with ministry ideas must explain how it will be funded.  They cannot expect to dump ministry costs on the church budget.  If God is calling you to do a thing, he can probably help you find a way to fund it.

Once people could demonstrate success on the three things above, we turned them lose to follow their calling.

The result of turning people loose to follow their call is that suddenly, there are many things going on in the church, and you can no longer keep track of it all. Ministry is a grass roots level up thing, no longer a top down thing. Tom Bandy wrote a book called Christian Chaos. It is about what happens in a church when everyone is listening and responding to God's calling. You can no longer manage it, you can no longer control it, the Holy Spirit is just working and you have to stand back and say Wow!

I want to encourage everyone, everywhere to hear God's call and look for ways to live out what He has placed on your heart. The most exciting part of being a Christian is being in ministry, and its not just for pastors. God calls us all.

For more on permission giving, here is a YouTube video with some more permission giving propaganda.

video on permission giving

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Healthy Church

From time to time I think about the work that we did to help make Woods Chapel UMC a healthy church.

One of the things that we did was to have a ministry audit by Bill Easum's company.  The result of that audit was a number of motions that were passed by the church council and put into motion over the next months and years...

From church council, Saturday, August 26th, 2000 6:00pm and passed unanimously.
4. Motion: That the missions statement is the plumb line of the church by which everything else is measured.

5. Motion: We affirm that the mission is non-negotiable and that everything else is expendable for the mission if need be. I.e. ballfield vs parking

10. Motion: when we find that we are struggling to reach consensus, we are committed to pray and to carefully ask the question “What is God doing, and do I disagree because this goes against the leading of the spirit and the mission of the church or because I prefer something else?” And that we consider the question “where is God’s will, and where is my will?”

11. Motion: that we work toward balanced programming by affirming the cycle of ministry as defined by the “inviting, forming and sending” model.

15. Motion: while being committed to serve those who hurt, we agree to grow in Christ so that we are able to affirm the statement “we are called to serve, not to be served”

16. Motion: that we commit to dream big. That we affirm the belief that God is big enough to fulfill his dreams in us as outlined in Eph 3:20 “God is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.”

18. Motion: that we affirm the statement “membership is a responsibility not a privilege” [33]

23. Motion: We affirm the belief that those who are not here matter as much if not more than those who are already here.

25. Motion: that while we work to nurture people of all ages, we make a stronger commitment to reach folks in their 20’s, who are the future of tomorrow’s church. [35]

You can see that there were many more motions that passed, but I hold these few out as those that seem most important to me. You can hear the outward focused nature of the proposals. You can hear the church reaching for and embracing the ideals of selflessness.

When we make it about me, my comfort and my preference, we get off track, we get off mission. When we put others first, when we put the mission first, things start to get back on track.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

ridiculous

I read the online news.  Maybe I should stop.

One of the current headlines is this: "100 foot waves are headed for the US."  

This is theoretically from Hurricane Erin that is several hundred miles off shore.  In 2016, hurricane Matthew was 30 miles of shore and we did not get any huge waves.

I get so disgusted with the way the news media needs to exaggerate everything.  It is like they need to keep everyone in a state of fear.

How about this... If it is a calm news day, just tell us that there is a calm news day.  No traffic issues... weather as usual.  Sports is all preseason...

Another thing about their sensationalism... they never come back and apologize when they predict a 12" snowfall and it snows 1/4 of an inch.  They never admit they were wrong when the predicted tsunamis do not hit.

Why try to keep people all up in arms all the time?  Life is good.  Just work on seeing the good and helping people live happy productive lives.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

storage

Before I start this post, I give a pass to anyone who has kids who are in that not quite moved out/moved back in stage... mine filled an apartment with stuff and then had to come home = storage unit.

I am forever amazed at the number of new storage facilities that are being built.  We Americans have so much stuff.   It doesn't work in the living room so it goes to the closet.  The closet is over run so some of it has to go to the garage.

Eventually it gets tossed into the trash or donated to the thrift store.

But now we have a storage unit.  That is where you pay to rent space so you can visit your garbage.

I read some years ago that 30% of what you have in your house, in your office, in your any where, could just be donated or thrown away into the trash.

We have so very much.  Instead of storing it away somewhere, why not give it to someone who could put it to use?

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

if you want to listen to Sunday's abbreviated sermon, you may click the link below.

click here to listen to Sunday's short sermon