"I love you and I am proud of you"

I do not remember my mother ever telling me that she loved me.  Maybe she did, but if she did, I do not remember.

I do remember the first time that my Dad told me that he loved me.  It was Easter Sunday 1996.  I was 38 years old.  Mom had been dead for a year, so Dad was finally able in his adult life to be the person that he wanted to be. [how sad is that.]

Anyway, he came out to church that Easter Sunday and came to the house for lunch after church.  He was sitting on the deck and I walked by to get something out of the kitchen.  As I walked by he said, "Son, I love you and I am proud of you."  I was pleasantly surprised.  I still think of it as a very happy moment.

Because of the lack of hearing that I was loved, I made sure that my kids heard it, and that they still do.  No one should grow up wondering if they are loved or not.

If you are not saying "I love you" to the people that you love, then it is time to start.  3 small words that mean a great deal.

I love you!!!

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

All Saints Day

Today, November 1st is All Saints Day.  It is traditionally a day when Christians remember those loved ones who have gone before us. On the night before, All hallows eve [Halloween] [yesterday] worshippers would have a party and remember the dead.  On November 1st, there were special church services.


Today is a day to remember those we love who have gone on before.

Today, among many other things, I will think of my Parents.  They were not perfect.  They were children of the depression.  They had a hard life.  They wasted nothing.  They did not tolerate anything that smelled like disrespect.  Boundaries were kept very firm between a parent and a child.  Questions were frowned upon.

But, they loved us, they cared for us, they fed us and they protected us, as they knew how.  They got us through college and they survived our craziness. [we were children of the 60's and 70's]

They gave me a chance at life.  I know that they loved us and if they had the chance today, they would tell us that they are proud of us.  

I hope that you have parents or mentors that helped launch you.  Although not perfect, where would we be today without them?

While I grieve the loss of family and friends, I savor their lives and I am thankful for them.

It's a beautiful day in God's world be sure to see the good.

Happy Halloween!!!

My mom was a pretty fundamental Christian.  Everything was black and white.  Lots of judgment.  That was then, this is now. She is in heaven with Jesus now and I know that she is basking in his love and sharing it with others.  She is whole.

So what does this have to do with Halloween?  My mom, the fundamental Christian,  loved Halloween.  She set aside all of her dogmas and let the dogs out for Halloween.  Demons that were feared and riled against during the rest of the year were amicably welcomed on Halloween.  She had more Halloween decorations than Christmas ones.......

One of my favorites was a sign, which went up every year on the front door.  The sign had an ugly witch on it and it said, "Welcome kiddies, put all your goodies in the box below... go quietly and no one will get hurt."  Yes there was a box underneath the sign.  No one ever left any candy, but I find the story to be so funny.

As a child we would run from house to house, covering many blocks.  When our pillow cases got full, we would go home and empty them out and go back for more.  Sometimes when we got home, we found that our Dad had raided our candy and pulled out the Hershey bars!!!

These days, things are different. Children do not run unsupervised... they go out protected by parents.  It is a shame what our world has become.

But my family still loves Halloween. Chili on the stove, scary movies on the TV. Kids coming to the door... it is a great day that we look forward to each year.

Have a Happy Halloween. October 31 is the Lord's day too. This is our father's world.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Harry Chapin

So I am driving down US one.  I’m hurdling down US one at 60 miles an hour.  5 miles over the speed limit.  A song comes on the radio by Harry Chapin.  I remember how he died tragically in a fiery car crash in the year 1981.  He was 39 years young.  

It occurs to me as I’m flying down the road that we are all very frail and that life can be dangerous and at any moment it could end.  No, I’m not expecting for it to end anytime soon, but I’m just hoping that this reminder will cause me and others to slow down and appreciate every moment.  Every waking hour is a gift from our Father.  It is not going to last for ever and it can end all too soon, so appreciate it all.

It’s a beautiful day in God’s world be sure to see the good.

Sermon video and such...

Here is the link from last Sunday's Sermon

click here

Someone was rude the other day.  Someone cut me off in traffic.  Someone is routinely nasty to me.

I want to fight back.  I want to get even.  I want to get revenge.

But if I do, I am giving in to a lesser life.  If I retaliate I put myself on their level.  If I allow my mind to linger on what has happened, it will poison my mood.

As they sang in the movie Frozen, "Let it go..."  Just let it go.  Release that person.  Refuse to relive the moment.  Lean away from the pain and towards the joy.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

The Rope Bridge

A few weeks ago I attended a meeting where our District Superintendent gave us a nice message.  She is a fine person for sure.

In her message she talked about life and leadership as walking across "a rope bridge."

She said that while you are walking on it, it is going to move.  Heck it is going to move when you aren't walking on it.  It will likely be scary and will test you in many ways.

But...

But, you must keep moving.

I loved the illustration.  This is what leadership is like.  This is what life is like.  Not as solid and steady as we like.  More moving to and fro... a bit unsettling.

But we must keep moving forward.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

worry gets in the way

 

We can only think about one thing at a time.  If you are worried, if you are focused on what is wrong, you are going to miss the good.

Set aside your worries.  See the good.  Most of what we worry about we won't even remember in two weeks.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Ignoring passages that hurt people

I often save things that I find inspirational to share later... I wish that all of my fundamentalist friends would read and digest this...

"Jesus consistently ignored or even denied exclusionary, punitive, and triumphalist texts in his own inspired Hebrew Bible in favor of passages that emphasized inclusion, mercy, and honesty. For example, referencing two passages from Exodus (21:24) and Leviticus (24:20), Jesus suggested the opposite: “You have heard it said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you . . . turn the other cheek” (see Matthew 5:38-39). He read the Scriptures in a spiritual, selective, and questioning way. Jesus had a deeper and wider eye that knew which passages were creating a path for God and which passages were merely cultural, self-serving, and legalistic additions."

Richard Rohr January 7, 2019

When people use scriptures to exclude or judge people, they are not following the way of Jesus. Just because something is in the Bible does not mean that it is helpful. Jesus ignored passages that hurt people. We should do the same.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

unexpected disappointment

Yesterday I posted about disappointment and I said that I did not have any at the present time.  Well, later yesterday, my right knee popped.

This is the knee that was replaced in June of 2023.  This is the knee that has been a miracle since the surgery.  It was so bad before the surgery and it has been so good.  Until yesterday.

Two years ago, before the surgery, I was on a trip to Israel and Egypt.  Some of my friends had to push me in a wheel chair.  The knee replacement fixed all of that.

As  I write this, the knee can barely bend and I am supposed to leave for Italy in 9 days with some of the same people.  I hope that they don't have to push me in a wheel chair again!

 In the picture I am using a walking stick that was loaned to me by Bill and Pam Carpenter.  They are not going on this trip so I will buy my own stick in a few days if the knee does not improve.

I was talking with a friend who felt bad for me.  I thought, well, this is not so bad, at least it is not lung cancer.

I think that it is important to put our disappointments in perspective.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

last Sunday's Sermon and disappointment

Here is the link to last Sunday's sermon

click here to watch or listen

I was thinking about recent disappointments that I have heard about.  Fortunately, I don't have any 
disappointments at present. But here are some that I have heard of...

• Someone spent too much money and now is stuck in between pay checks.
• Someone did not get the car that they wanted.
• Someone's child has yet another cavity.
• Someone did not get the job.
• Someone misses a friend...

Disappointment comes to all of us.  The question is not will it come, but what we will do with it when it does.

We can react to the thing or we can accept the thing.  We can have a bad attitude about it, or we can put the pain in perspective.  We can be in pain and choose to suffer or we can be in pain and choose not to suffer.

We have choices.  We can choose to be miserable, make ourselves miserable, and everyone else around us.  Or we can choose to put on a brave face.

In my experience, most disappointments come and go.  Don't let whatever it is ruin your day or your week.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Thursday's blog

Here we go.  I feel like I am running in 5 different directions at the same time.  I am doing well.  I am enjoying life.  I am in Chicago with my grandchildren.  

It is hard to find time to post something.  So I thank God for all of you who send good ideas in.

Joyce sent me a note about Steve Hartman with CBS who's children join him online for a feature called Kindness 101.

His daughter Meryl ends the segment by saying, "remember to stay kind."

I love that.  and I love that someone is teaching their children that from their youth.

Remember to stay kind.  All day.  In every way.  Remember to stay kind.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

from my friend Bruce

 "More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness"

                                                            Charlie Chaplin

nothing to say

Sometimes I have nothing to say.

I have one reader who swears that they can tell when I am passionately writing something and when I am just simply putting something out there because I have nothing else to say.

hmm...

Well, no one is, no one feels inspired every day.  Sometimes we struggle to articulate good things about life.

But for me, I am 68 years old and I woke up today.  So I am happy.  Life is good.  Many other people did not get the wake up call for today.

And did I tell you that today I am flying to Chicago to see my grandchildren???

That makes it a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good!!!

my Dad said...

My Dad said, "son, there will always be people who have more than you, and people who have less.  Work hard and be content with what you have."

So Mark Wahlberg just bought a $30 million dollar place in Delray Beach.  I love Mark.  I love his movies.  I love eating at his restaurants.

Ok, he has more than we do.  No worries.  We need to be positive.  We cannot focus on not having enough.  We all just need to do what John Wesley said, "Make all you can, save all you can, and give all you can."

Life is good.  Be thankful for what ye have.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Despicable Me

So, one day last week I had a bad day.  I had a very tough meeting.  I cried that day.  Several times.  Disappointment can be a very powerful thing.

All day long I suffered with discouragement.

I met some friends for the Italy trip in Ft. Pierce.  That was good.

My wife and I ate dinner at Chili's.  That was good.

I got home and I needed to change my mood.  I searched on Netflix for the movie Despicable Me.  It is a movie for children, [or adults...]  I needed to laugh.  I laughed and laughed and I cried.

It was a totally awesome mood breaker.

If you need a lift, watch Despicable Me on Netflix.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

great question

A few weeks ago my friend Tim C asked me a fantastic question.  "What is the best part of being Jeff Brinkman right now???"

I immediately started thinking of, and naming off every thing that was going wrong in my life.

Then I realized, that is not the question.  He didn't ask me what was wrong... so I got to thinking about what was going right.

Instead of seeing the good, my brain went to my complaints and ailments.  How sad.

What is the best thing about being me right now?  I am in relatively good health.  I have a ton of friends and people that love me.  I am enjoying being the pastor at Oceanview UMC.  I have a great family.

There is plenty for me to appreciate and be thankful for.

What is the best part about being you right now?

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Shame

Shame leaves marks that last for a long time.  Sometimes they never go away.  99 people say that they love you.  1 person says something bad to you and we are thrown into a downward spiral.

Why do we allow the words of the 1 to impact us so much?  For me, it takes me back to my childhood.  There was so much guilt and shame.  It was the major way that we were raised, disciplined and controlled.

By the age of 68 I should be over feeling bad when someone says something bad... maybe I can move past it before I turn 69.

Work on resisting shame.  Jesus never shamed anyone.  You are a wonderful, amazing human.  Let yourself feel like that!!!

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

who we listen to

I think that we should listen to others.  I try to do so.  I get smarter when I listen to others.  And Lord, I need to get smarter.

Someone out there thinks that I am listening to the wrong person.  I think about that and I talk to the person that I am listening to about that.  We do need to self-evaluate from time to time.

Most of us think we are right.  If we thought we were wrong, wouldn't we change?

Who do you listen to?  Are they helping you build a positive future?  Are they reinforcing kindness?

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

mean people

Why do people have to be mean?

Why do they have to be unkind?

Being nice is not that hard.

I am repulsed by selfishness... but I am also aware that I am not that good at seeing selfishness within me.

Lord please help me to be more kind.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

sermon from Sunday and a shameless appeal

Here is the link to Sunday's sermon/message...

click here to watch or listen

Here is my shameless appeal... In my life I have collected coins, Sunday school pins and hot wheel cars.  A few years ago I started collecting license plates.  I have about 1/2 of the states.

If you have an extra plate laying around I will trade you a Missouri, Florida or California as I have several of those.  Or I will just buy one from you.

Do you collect things?  What do you collect?  Why?

I collect things because it makes me feel good to have a random sampling of certain things.

I hope you get joy out of whatever you collect.  And what a nice first world problem to have.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

everyone is dealing with something

My friend Donna shared this with me...


"This morning on my way to work, I followed a car with a sign in the back window that said:

“Learning stick. Sorry for any delay.”

Knowing that, I stayed patient through the slow shifts and jerky starts — and honestly, they were doing pretty well for someone still learning.

But then I caught myself wondering:
Would I have been just as patient if I hadn’t seen that sign?
Probably not.

And that thought hit me hard.

Because the truth is, most people don’t wear signs that explain what they’re going through. You won’t see:

“Going through a divorce.”
“Lost a child.”
“Feeling depressed.”
“Just diagnosed with cancer.”

If we could see people’s struggles written out, we’d treat each other so much more gently.

But we shouldn’t need a sign to show kindness.

Everyone you meet is carrying something you can’t see. So let’s choose patience. Let’s choose grace. Let’s choose love — even when there’s no sign telling us to."

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

quote

My friend Bruce sent this in...

"The smallest deed is better than the grandest intention."

I would add, if you have a desire to do good, but do not act on it, your desire is futile.

Compassion is not delivered through intentions, but actual actions.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

it doesn't matter

Who is annoying you lately???

It doesn't matter how they act, they still deserve to be treated with compassion.

• An old person becomes bitter.
• A child is spoiled.
• A teenager says hateful things.
• Someone robs a store.
• A spouse says something hurtful.

On and on it goes.

Our default is to be nice to those who are nice to us but not to those who aren't. Jesus taught the opposite.

Mt 5

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor[a] and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?

Even though someone is crabby or mean, we can still issue them kindness. Don't be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

None needed

 

No explanation needed.  None.

I saw this fellow wearing this shirt at the Atlanta airport last week.  We had a nice visit.  The message of his shirt is simple.  "Let God sort them out."  "LET GOD SORT EM OUT."

Yes we can stop the judgment.  Yes we can stop the hatred.  We can stop pointing out who we think the sinners are.

All we need to do is come to believe that we are not in charge.  God is.  And God will sort them out. Or maybe God will embrace them all.  

When our brain finally arrives at this thought, our lives become happier because we are no longer worried about who is good or bad, and who is in or out.  We are finally free from the pressure to be right and we can simply love people and let God sort them out.

It's a beautiful day in god's world, be sure to see the good.

The other person

The other person.  They are not you.  They are other.  Or are they?

It is way too easy in this life to live inside of the cocoon of our life.  Our thinking, our ideas, our ways.  We so easily make it about us.  I make it about me.

This way of living turns life into a me vs them.  I am me, you are you, they are they.  Sometimes we feel that we must protect ourselves from others.  From their ways, their ideas, and their beliefs.  After all, we don't know them do we?

What if we stopped looking at them as "other?"  Am I  really that different than you?  Are we really that separated?  Or is it possible that we have much more in common than we thought.

Tragic moments cause us to pull together.  Complete strangers come together in random moments for survival.

Why can't we act this way all the time?  We don't have to see people as a stranger or different or other.  We can see them as fellow humans.  Fellow travelers on this journey of life.

They are not other.  We are all flowing together in the same stream of life, moving towards a common end.  A little awareness and kindness along the path will go a long way.

We can start today.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

The difference

Some random moments of life...

• I order food at the taco bell counter.
• I walk past the administrator's desk on the way into work.
• I see the mail man pull up to the box.
• The Amazon driver brings something to the door.
• The server comes up to my table at IHOP.
• I see someone walk in the door at church.

You get the idea.

Normal moments like these can become holy moments simply because of how we choose to treat that human that we are seeing.  We can stay stuck in our world, our issues, and our worries, or we can see them, smile at them and say hello.

You can, I can make a difference in every and any moment in this life.  It begins with a choice to "see" the other person.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Only Love

Heard somewhere recently... "only love gives meaning to the world."  

I think that there is a lot of truth to this.  And so it begs a question.... how much time during any given day or any given week, how much time am I, are you engaged in the practice of multiplying love?

How do we get it out there?  How do we deliver it?  Who do we deliver it to?

I begins with believing that love is important.  It finds legs when we identify a person to share that love with.  It doesn't have to be complicated... just be nice.  Show kindness.  Ask their name.

Only love gives meaning to the moments of our lives.  Treat every person as if they matter.  Because they do.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

circumstances

Terry M is a wise friend of mine. From time to time he sends me things that make me think. Recently he sent this note:

"So often we pray for our circumstances to change, but as we change, our circumstances change."


Jeff adds... so if we pray that God will make us sweeter and more gracious, we may come to see our circumstances a little differently.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Happy Birthday Woods Chapel UMC!!!

Today is the 50th anniversary celebration of the Woods Chapel United Methodist Church. It was my deep deep pleasure to be the pastor there for 22 years, from 1994-2016.   From the age of 37-59.  I long time!!!

I met so many wonderful people along the way and worked with some amazing staff people. Looking back, I am thankful for so many things. Here is a small list…

1. We created a church that was good for men. Not just women and children, but families came to our church. One of the best compliments I ever received was when a wife would come to me and say, “my husband has become a better man because of this church.”

2. I will be ever thankful to what we created in terms of worship space. The sanctuary, built in 1999 with it’s beautiful windows, and the worship center, added in 2009. Both have provided so many opportunities for hearts to be warmed.

3. I am so proud of the church grounds. So much work went into them by so many people. The walking trails, the stations of the cross, the many many trees. The pavilion, the labrynth, the columbarium and the many gardens all make the church grounds a truly holy place.

4. Finally, I am the most happy about the fact that we became a missional church. It took time but we were finally able to move away from the old church model where worship and Christian education were the most important and discover the joy of an outward focus. I will always remember fondly what we did for 3 years after Hurricane Katrina. I will remember our building of over 100 homes in Nicaragua. I will remember all of the many missions that sprang from the hearts of the members who were feeling God’s call to share the love.

Happy days! Happy Anniversary Woods Chapel! I love you all!!!

South Sanctuary Window - Old Testament

Columbarium Area with bridge in background

Entrance to the Stations of the cross and walking trails

Chime Chapel

Bridge over the small creek on the walking trail

Walking trail

Pear trees in April

Connecting People to Jesus Christ

Lovely peaceful place...

Pastor's view on Sunday Morning

We planted many many trees

Worship Center - opened 2009

Prayer wall - fantastic!!!

Coffee Bar

New foyer... completed in 2009

Sanctuary built 1999

Jonnie Wells lining out the troops at a landscape work day.

Message on the way off the property...

What a great place.  So glad to have been a part of the journey.

Leaders que others

Leaders que others.  They tip off other people about what behavior is appropriate.

If you are a leader and you think that screaming is good, then you can be assured that your followers will scream as well.

If you are a leader and you are into yoga and meditation and you express the value of such practice, then those who listen to you will likely follow suit.

Others watch what we do.

If it is ok for me to complain about things, then my children will probably learn that complaining is normal.

So the moral of this story is this... we are all leaders in one way or another.  Someone is watching each of us.  What will we model for them?  What will be increased in this world because of our behavior?

Friends, we are here only to love one another.  Check all behavior by that standard.  Model nothing less than love and kindness.

It's a beautiful day in God's world be sure to see the good.

Rapture - ugh!

I am writing this on Tuesday September 23rd.  I hopped on a 5:50 am flight to Kansas City.  I was watching the news at 3am.  

Evidently some preacher and some fundamentalist Christians are saying that the rapture is today... or tomorrow.  Well it is 7:45am, I am in the Atlanta airport and nothing has happened yet.

I do not believe in the rapture.  It is a doctrine that was created in the 1850's by John Nelson Darby.  If you don't believe me, look it up.

Yet, the myth persists.  Some people would rather live in the world of speculative theology than live in the world of love.  If I have something crazy to think about and to scare others with, then I don't have to think about how I treat others.

Please do not drink the rapture kool-aid.  Instead, drink the love potion.  Don't worry about speculative theology.  Give yourself to living a life of love.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Update... those who predicted the rapture last week have now set a new date for 2026.  

Surprise!!!

Proverbs 16:7

"When a man's ways please the LORD, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him."

Prov 16:7 KJV

Do you have enemies?  Can you make peace with them?  Have you tried?  When we lead with kindness, we have many fewer enemies... Many fewer people who are against us.

When we apply ourselves to reconciliation, when we allow the other drivers to merge into traffic in front of us, we have fewer enemies.

Take a step back.  Rest.  Give up on winning.  It's ok.  It is ok to let others have the place of honor.  It is ok to allow others to shine.  It is ok to have other people move into your space.

When we stop fighting the war, we make our enemies and potential enemies to be at peace with us.

Stop.  Breathe.  Live.  Live in peace.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

questions

Life has it's questions.  Some people get nervous and want all of the answers.  Others go with the flow.

Recently someone asked a few questions about where the church was going.  I thought the answer was appropriate... "we are unable to remove the unknown from the journey upon which we are embarking."

Surely in your life there are questions.  Do you insist on trying to direct and control things?  Or can you trust in God and go with the flow.

It is impossible to remove the unknown from the journey that we all are on.

It's still a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Love the Lord and link to sermon from Sunday

I was listening to the news.  It was a pretty partisan program as most of them are these days.

They were lifting up a certain person as someone who really really "loves the Lord."  Keep in mind this was not on the Christian Broadcasting Network.  This was on regular TV.

Great.  They are trying to make the point that so and so "loves the Lord."  Then here is my question.... if this person loves the Lord, then where is the kindness?

They will know we are Christians by our love.  Where is the love?

Let's be sure to be those who show it.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Here is the link to Sunday's sermon

click here to watch

The Horse Whisperer

In the 1998 film the Horse Whisperer, Robert Redford helps wounded horses regain their purpose.

The horse whisperer touches the face of the wild horse. He looks the horse in the eye. He speaks to the horse. And, somehow, the horse gets it. The horse remembers who he is and what he is about. The horse reaches back beyond his current thinking to the purpose of his creation.

The horse quiets. The horse relaxes. The horse becomes a part of the solution. The horse acts in concert with God's plan for the horse. All because the horse whisperer got a hold of him.

Sometimes we need to get the attention of others and whisper.  Sometimes we need to help people remember who they are and why they are here.

Sometimes someone needs to whisper to me and remind me.

Let's help each other stay on the path, stay on the purpose and remember who we are.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

WW

I have a friend.  I feel compelled to write to him and about him.

Sir you are a good man.  I know it.  I can sense it.  You texted me last week.  Some question about the book of Genesis.

I have always thought so highly of you.  I am always glad to see you.  I am always pleased when we run into each other.

I know that there have been some broken bones lately.  I am so so sorry about that.  I think of you and my heart grieves with you.

You are ok.  It will be ok.  You matter to many.  You matter to me.  Please be encouraged.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Thoughts on prayer

I think that you can pray for whatever you want.  I encourage you to avoid selfish prayers, but pray as you wish.

Remember that prayer is not ultimately about me getting what I want.  Prayer is about aligning my heart and life with God.  

Some say, prayer changes things.  I say, true prayer changes me.

Pray as you wish, just always end your prayers with this statement, "and no matter what the answer is, no matter the outcome, I/We put our trust in you."

Pray as you wish but trust God no matter what happens.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Everything Happens

Sometimes mayhem just happens.

The other day someone said this to me: "everything happens for a reason."

I completely disagree.  The notion is that God is in control and what ever is happening to you, there is a divine reason behind it.

Someone once told me, and I like this... "God is in control, but he is not controlling."

If everything happens for a reason, then God is giving children cancer, orchestrating plane crashes and causing all sorts of mayhem.

I prefer to believe that things happen in this world.  We don't know if they are from God or if they just happen.  I don't see the point of blaming everything on him.

What I do believe is that there is something to learn from everything that comes our way.  Even in the worst of circumstances when things are happening that we cannot blame God for, there are lessons.

Lessons on humility, lessons on trust, lessons on opening our minds.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Are you delivering burdens or love?

In Matthew 23 Jesus gets after the Pharisees.

“The teachers of the law and the Pharisees sit in Moses’ seat. 3 So you must be careful to do everything they tell you. But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach. 4 They tie up heavy, cumbersome loads and put them on other people’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to lift a finger to move them..

When I was younger, I thought that the point of this passage was that you better be good and practice what you preach. But now I see it a different way.

Jesus is saying, stop preaching and teaching things that put rules, laws and burdens on people. Doing so only causes them to focus on the wrong things of life.  Life is not about who is good enough.  Life is not about who the good ones are.

God loves everyone.  Jesus freed people from guilt and shame.  If we would follow his ways, we would seek to become lovers of people, not controllers.

Let them be. Let them live. Let them find happiness and love.  And if we can give a life of love to others, maybe we can find it ourselves as well.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

I was once one

As a follow up on yesterday's post, I hate to admit it, but I will admit it... I once was once one of those people.  I was a part of a "Christian" group that thought they were right and everyone else was wrong.

I went upon my way for many years insisting that I knew, and you did not.  I put demands on myself and on others that no one could keep.

At the age of 22 I was put in charge of the shop at the asphalt company that I worked for.  Six men in their 40's worked in the shop keeping the equipment up.  Did I say that I was 22.

Because I had drank the Kool-Aid, I insisted that the radio in the shop be turned only to the local Christian station.  They guys of course wanted to listen to rock and roll.  Back and forth we went.  They took their complaint against my insistence to the President of the company.  Since he drank the Kool-Aid as well, he backed me.

One of the employees quit his job.  He quit his job because of my self-righteous attitude and my insistence that they listen to the radio station of my choice.

One of the other employees, who was a kind man, took me aside and explained to me what had happened:  a good man who had a family to feed, quit his job with nothing else lined up, because of me.  My attitude and outlook on life had brought serious pain to a man and his family.

I was devastated.  It was the first time in my life that I saw how my self-righteous attitude was actually hurting people.  Thank God it was the beginning of my life journey away from judgment.

I pray that your practice of your faith is not hurting others.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

drinking the Kool-aid and sermon from sunday

It was November 1978.  Over 900 people would drink cyanide laced Kool-Aid at the direction of their pastor, Jim Jones.

And so the phrase "drinking the Kool-Aid" was born.   It has come to refer to any person who swallows whole, doctrines that are not healthy.

And there are plenty of them out there.

Any teachings that make a person rigid and inflexible are not healthy.  Any teachings that focus more on perceived truth than love are hurtful.  Teachings that fill people's lives with fear and guilt are not of God.

There are way too many people out there that are filled with fear, guilt and judgment.  Way to many people who would rather insist that they are right than follow the way of love.

Don't be one.

What happened at Jonestown in 1978 was irreversible for the people who drank the Kool-Aid.  The good news for we humans who are alive now, even if we have in the past drank the drink of high demand religions, it is not too late.

We can change.  We can look to see the damage that our thoughts and words are doing to ourselves and to others and change.  We can choose a new path.  We can choose the way of love.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Here is the link to Sunday's Sermon

click here to listen to Sundays sermon

Thoughts on Tipping

I messed up the timing on this post but I thought it was important so if you missed it, here it is again...

Why do we tip?  They don't tip in Europe.

I guess that initially, the idea in America was that we tip for good service.  So for some, that means that if I don't like something about the service that I received, I can not tip or I can give a small tip.

Some people don't tip at all.  What is that about???

I was in a situation two months ago when I was eating with a friend.  We discussed the tip and we disagreed.  He felt that the service was poor and so we should not tip.  I agreed that the service was poor, but I still left a tip.

I got to thinking about that situation later when I got home... Maybe tipping is not just about the service that we receive...

Do I tip the airport shuttle driver because he drove in an excellent manner?  Do I give more at church if the sermon is better?  Did the hotel housekeeper really do an excellent job???

What if tipping is about something else.  What if tipping is recognizing that I have an opportunity to bless someone else.  What if tipping is a small way that I can show kindness.  $2 or $3 or $5 or 20% I promise you will mean a whole lot more to the person we are tipping than it does to us.

Or is keeping $3 more important to me than showing kindness to someone who obviously has so much less than I do?

What if we got ourselves out of the way?  What if tipping is not a response to what we received and instead we thought of it as a way to be good to people.

Just a thought.

It's a beautiful day in God's world be sure to see the good.

thoughts on tipping

Why do we tip?  They don't tip in Europe.

I guess that initially, the idea in America was that we tip for good service.  So for some, that means that if I don't like something about the service that I received, I can not tip or I can give a small tip.

Some people don't tip at all.  What is that about???

I was in a situation two months ago when I was eating with a friend.  We discussed the tip and we disagreed.  He felt that the service was poor and so we should not tip.  I agreed that the service was poor, but I still left a tip.

I got to thinking about that situation later when I got home... Maybe tipping is not just about the service that we receive...

Do I tip the airport shuttle driver because he drove in an excellent manner?  Do I give more at church if the sermon is better?  Did the hotel housekeeper really do an excellent job???

What if tipping is about something else.  What if tipping is recognizing that I have an opportunity to bless someone else.  What if tipping is a small way that I can show kindness.  $2 or $3 or $5 or 20% I promise you will mean a whole lot more to the person we are tipping than it does to us.

Or is keeping $3 more important to me than showing kindness to someone who obviously has so much less than I do?

What if we got ourselves out of the way?  What if tipping is not a response to what we received and instead we thought of it as a way to be good to people.

Just a thought.

It's a beautiful day in God's world be sure to see the good.

Lead with Love, Pt. 3

Every good sermon has 3 points.  Here is the end of the 3 part series on "lead with love."   [although I hope that the blog always point us to lead with love]  The series was interrupted yesterday by International Talk like a Pirate day.  Which I would say this to, love is important, but so is talking like a pirate on September 19.

Lead with love means that I am not here to take from you.  I am here to see you, to care about you and to invest in you.  My entire posture in life needs to shift away from self and towards me learning to love.

Saying "lead with love" is one thing.  Learning to do it, learning to make yourself 2nd, is another indeed.

I am not here to take from you.  I am not here to use you for my benefit.  I am here to show love.  It is a total life paradigm change.

May we all be willing to do the hard work to move away from a self-oriented existence to one that leads with love towards others.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Talk like a Pirate Day!!!

RRR matey! It's here again. National talk like a Pirate day.

What does a pirate say on his 80th birthday???  I'm Eighty!  [aye matey]

What do you say to a pirate captain with one eye?  Aye Captain.

What do you say to a pirate captain with two eyes?  Aye Aye Captain.

What kind of movies do pirates watch? Rated RRR

Why are pirates cool??? They just RRR

What is a pirate's favorite letter???

RRR you say, no it's The C

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender say, Hey I haven't seen you in months. You look terrible. What happened to your leg? The pirate says, RRR a cannon ball took my leg off at the knee so now I have this wooden leg.

The bartender says, and what about your hand? How did you get that hook? RRR the pirate says, I was in a sword fight, and right before I run the bloke thru, he chops off my hand. So now I have this hook.

The bartender say, and you eye? How did you get the patch? The pirate says, RRR don't che know, a seagull pooped in my eye.

The bartender quite confused asks, you lost your eye because a seagull pooped in your eye? Nooo the pirate says, but don't che know it was the first day of my new hook!!!

I love that joke!

by the way, where do pirates buy their hooks? At the second hand store.

RRR its a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Lead with Love, Pt 2.

The second thing that I want to say about leading with love in your life is this... be willing to admit that you were wrong.

Apologize.  Those who cannot learn to apologize simply leave a trail of hurt.  What if part of our approach to life in general included this idea... "I may be wrong."  Where ever we start our discussions, no matter how strongly I feel about a thing, I may be wrong.

When we insist that we are right, we put ourselves above others.  When we begin with, "here are my ideas, but I may be wrong,"  we give others room to dialog with us.

Lead with love.

I may be wrong.  I open myself to you and your ideas.  I love you.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Lead w Love pt 1

Bishop Tom Berlin preached a sermon at Ft. Pierce First UMC.  The title was "lead with love."  You can guess what it was about.

When I think about leading with love, I think of many things.  First of all I think of the idea of actually seeing other people.  See the person taking your order at Taco Bell as a person.  See the other drivers not as enemy combatants but as people.  See the person that you disagree with as a person that God loves.

We cannot lead with love if we don't SEE other people.  Lead with love.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Tried your best

Coldplay sang, "when you try your best but you don't succeed."  I think that we have all had the experience of trying to do a thing or make something happen and it just doesn't work out as you planned.

In those moments I would say, keep trying to do the good.  Don't stop believing.  Doing the good is worth pursuing even when we fail a time or two, or 3.

You have never really failed until you quit.  Don't quit.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

make it last

After Charlie Kirk's murder I was watching the news.  The news anchor had a couple of US congressmen on.  They were from different sides of the aisle, but they are good friends.  They are among the few who are committed to working together for the betterment of the country.

The news anchor compared the feelings that many have now with how people felt after 9-11. 

General feelings of How could this happen?  And a general quiet, calm and coming together...

The anchor mentioned that after 9-11, the peaceful good feelings lasted for about a month.  She asked the two congressmen what could be done to keep the cooperation and kindness going.

I have an answer to that.  Here I go:  

Somehow in America a culture of hate and division has been created.  How about we stop reporting when a politician says something hateful.  How about you don't get news coverage if you bash people.  How about instead of modeling division, the news media holds up those who are kind.

Maybe something would change.

I know that no one in the news will ever read this, but I will tell  you my friends that we can create culture in our homes, in our work places and anywhere that we go.  Those who choose negative, destructive behavior should not be promoted.  We need to model kindness and uphold healthy behavior.  

You can, I can create and sustain positive culture one person, one day, one moment at a time.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

On the death of Charlie Kirk

I was going to write something about the murder of this man, but my friend Wendy Minshal wrote some great words.  She is one of the most kind people that I know.  She is the pastor of the Peculiar UMC in Peculiar MO.

Here is part of what she posted on Facebook:

I can’t sleep, my mind Is spinning, and my heart aches.
I want the hate to stop. I want there to be peace on earth, in our country, in our communities, churches, families, homes. I want peace for the human heart.
I don’t want someone’s (ANYONE’s!) death celebrated. I don’t want school shootings (or ANY violent death/attack) ignored.
It doesn’t matter who’s to blame for the division, or the way hate has manifested in the human heart… It matters that we stop it.
It MATTERS what we say… how we act… the empathy we feel AND the empathy we withhold- It ALL matters.

Sometimes it is hard to see the good. But this is still our father's world, and there is still much good to see.

still mad

Something happened the other day that I am still mad about.  I woke up the day after and I was still mad.  That is unusual.  I get mad, but I don't stay mad.  And it is rare that I don't sleep off a mad.

But this person won the award.  What they said to me was so hurtful and ridiculous!!!

This person is not a blog reader.  We have helped them more over the years than any other person in any church that I have been involved with.

Some people are just detached from reality.

The moral of this story is this:  Keep being good to people, regardless of how they respond to you.  Keep working on forgiving.  The mad will eventually go away.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

a bigger picture

My friend Terry wrote in and said this, "Can you see a bigger picture? That question alone draws me closer to God."

I would add... can you see a picture besides the one that shows up conveniently in your head? Are you open to ideas that are outside of yourself?

When we choose to look past our preconceived notions, it always draws us closer to reality and to God.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

The Zoo

Last Friday I went to the zoo with my daughter Allison and her children, my grandchildren:  Bella age 5 and Cruz age 2 1/2.

How long has it been since I was at the zoo?  Probably since my children were young.... 25 years anyway.   Well, the Melbourne Florida zoo is awesome.

Lots of shade, lots of animals that you can see, a train ride and lots of children's activities.

We were told that this is a very nice giraffe.
Willing to stick his neck out for anyone.

 Just Lion around.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a 
Rhino???  Elephino.

Baby Zebra

Babe, Paul Bunyan's Ox.

On display now through Thanksgiving!!!

Bella watches the Bear eat.

Two lovely bald eagles.  Both left flightless
after accidents.  Very nice to see.

lots of hungry carp.

Bobcat.  Don't let your domestic cats outside in Florida.

Flamingos think they are smart.  
They are always trying to get a leg up on you.

Alli w Cruz and Bella.  Flamingos for background singers.

We had a blast!!!

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.