Towards a bigger heart

"If some dirt falls into our water glass, we won’t drink that water, we’ll have to throw it away. But if we put that dirt into an immense river, we can still use the water. The river is big; it can accept the dirt and we can drink the water...."  ~Thich Nhat Hanh

You don't diminish Niagara Falls by spitting into it.

A small heart is offended by the smallest of offenses.  A large heart absorbs the pain.  A small heart remembers every hurt.  A large heart works to release itself from every hurt.

If the Grinch's heart grew, then so can ours. 

Pray for empathy.  Cease from judging others.  Begin to see the good.

Give the grace to others that you would want to receive yourself.  Oh, who said that?

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Excuses

After the posts on the Good Samaritan, a friend asked me for a list of excuses that religious people use to avoid helping people.

Here are some that come to my mind... what comes to your mind?  I would love to hear what you come up with...

Here is what pops into my brain...

Religious people don't help other people because...

• I am too busy
• They don't deserve to be helped.
• They should get a job.
• They are dirty.
• I am afraid of them.
• They are not like me.
• They make me uncomfortable.
• It is my money, I worked hard for it.
• My life is about me, not them.
• Christianity is not about giving things away.

My friend added...

• I am already helping [enough]
• I worry that I am enabling and not helping.
• I'll do it next time.

On and on the excuses can go.  May we get over ourselves and work to become more generous people.  Please remember, it is much better to give one time too many and be taken advantage of, then to give one time too few and leave a human brother or sister in need.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Moment of silence

Some years ago, a survey was taken of the parts of the worship service, ranked by popularity.  The part voted #1 in the survey was the silent prayer.  No talking.  No preacher talking.  No preacher doing anything.  Just congregant and God.

I think that these are our purest moments with God.  No preacher needed.  No TV, no radio, no Pandora, no podcasts.  Just me and my heart in a moment of commune with God.

Some theologians list the practice of silence as a spiritual discipline.  Not just prayer, fasting, Bible study, service and such, but silence as a spiritual discipline.

Try it sometime.  Set aside 10 minutes and just sit in silence.  Go into the sanctuary at church or at home and just sit in silence.

I find it to be a beautiful time.  Silence is golden.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

engaging the broken

God engages the broken.  He cares about the least of these.  The homeless, the lost, the losers.  And so there is a difference between real spirituality and what humans have done with religion.

Religion gives people an excuse to ignore the poor.  Religious people come up with all kinds of reasons why they don't need to help the broken.

Spiritual folks are different.  True spirituality shakes a person up.  It breaks through their excuses.  It helps them to see that "we are all in this together" spirituality drives us head over heals into the realm where we want to help the less, the least and the lost.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, and we can make it even better by learning to care for the broken.

the Christian walk

Recently a friend asked me about the concept of the "Christian walk."  Another phrase that is not found in the Bible.

Most Christians that use this terminology think of the Christian walk as a collection of the habits of praying, attending church, giving money, sharing your faith, and helping others.  But again, the phrase is not in scripture.

If someone feels far from God, then they need to work on their Christian walk, so say the formula folks.  Feeling far away from God?  Pray more, give more, try to convert others.

I want to hold up a different picture of the Christian walk.  What is the Christian walk?  Let's look at the story of the Good Samaritan.  Walking is going on in this story.

Two churchy people are out for a walk.  They are on the way to the temple to do religious things.  They walk on by the broken man.  They are on the way to church and can't be bothered.  They are probably planning to pray more, give more, and worship more.

Another man is walking that day as well.  He is an outcast, a Samaritan.  He sees the broken man and walks right up to him.  He tends the mans wounds, helps him and puts him up in a hotel.

You tell me, who had the Christian walk?  Who was walking close to God?

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Rules

God doesn't need our rules.  He needs us to relax.  God certainly does not need our judgments.  He simply wants us to love people.

Far too many churches and religious folk get this wrong.  Since it is easier to make rules and judge people, that is what many religious folks opt for.

Spirituality does not hurt people, it frees people.  True spirituality does not try to control or shame others, it reaches out in love and welcomes them.

Jesus was not a rule guy, but he was an incredibly loving guy.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Others

I am not particularly a Joel Osteen fan, but I love this saying from him...

There is a song in the old Cokesbury hymnal entitled "Others."  A few years ago I was filling in at the Ft. Pierce First United Methodist Church.  There was no choir that day, and no special music, so I decided to sing that song.  My friend Dick Lystra was gracious to play it, and I sang it, a solo.

The song seemed to fall flat.  No reply, no enjoyment.  Crickets.  Looking back on that moment, it is a pretty serious song, and I am not the best singer.  The folks at First United Methodist Church [love that name] still loved me.

Here are the words to that old song.

Lord, help me live from day to day
In such a self-forgetful way
That even when I kneel to pray
My prayer shall be for others.

Refrain:
Yes, others, Lord, yes, others,
Let this my motto be;
Help me to live for others,
Help me to live for others,
That I may live like Thee,
That I may live like Thee.

Help me in all the work I do
To ever be sincere and true,
And know that all I’d do for You
Must needs be done for others.

Let “Self” be crucified and slain
And buried deep: and all in vain
May efforts be to rise again,
Except to live for others.

So when my work on earth is done,
And my new work in heav’n’s begun,
I’ll praise You for the crown I’ve won,
But praise You more for others.

Refrain:
Yes, others, Lord, yes, others,
Let this my motto be;
Help me to live for others,
Help me to live for others,
That I may live like Thee,
That I may live like Thee.

The song was written in 1902. The words are still important for us today.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Me to We

The monkey sees a penny in a jar.  He reaches in to get it.  With the penny in his closed fist, he cannot remove his hand from the jar.  It is only when he drops the penny, drops the self-interest, that he can pull out his hand.

You know I read Richard Rohr's daily devotional.  I love his thinking.

Recently he posted one that included the phrase moving from "me to we."  Now in my brain, this can become political real quick.  Trump talked about America first.  Well, on a political note, I do believe that we need to strike a balance between giving all of America's assets away and taking care of our own.  Keeping America strong while being a part of a global community.  Whatever your political views are, the issues are complicated.

But let us consider the phrase, "me to we" on a personal basis.  When we are babies it is all about me.  Feed me, hold me, clean me.  Me, me me.  Somewhere along the line, we [hopefully] engage in the process of growing up.  Growing up means thinking long term.  Growing up includes the consideration of how my actions effect others.  Growing up means moving away from selfishness into something that is more inclusive and other oriented.  There is something bigger, something more important than me, mine, and what I want.

Selfishness, while promising to make us happy, never brings the desired results.  Loving others, reaching out, showing compassion and empathy on the other hand, takes our minds off of our worries and gives us a feeling of satisfaction...  that is why I am, that is why we are here, to love others.

The journey of life... from me to we...  let us continue.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

We need to be there for others

Our choice...

We have a choice to make every day.  Do I let my day, my attitude this day, be dominated by the difficulty in my life, or do I work past it to see the good.

My children are in trouble from time to time.  My granddaughter lives a long way away.  My knee hurts.  The economy is tough on us now, as it is on everyone.  My car is acting up.  And those that know me well know that I have other, deep, unfortunate hurts.

We have a choice every day.  Let the bad things dominate us, or focus on something else.

I work hard to focus on the good.  It does not make the difficulties of life go away, they are still there.  But if I let them dominate me, I am unhappy and I am no good for myself or for anyone else.

All day long I am going to meet people that need a happy Jeff.  They need a kind Jeff.  They don't need a Jeff that is so lost in his stuff that he is a mess to them.

We need to focus on the good, and not the bad because others need us to be positive and constructive.  We need to focus on the good because we don't want our attitude to be dominated by the negative.

Let's bring glory to God, let us celebrate his goodness in the midst of our trials.  Let us find the joy and see the good.  It is much more constructive way to live.

It is a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Salvation

The Good Samaritan is a salvation story. It begins with this dialogue:

Luke 10: 25 On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?”
26 “What is written in the Law?” he replied. “How do you read it?”
27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’[c]; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[d]”
28 “You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.”

The story ends with the Samaritan helping the broken man.

The Samaritan is not held up as a person with eternal life because he went to church or followed a religious formula.  He is not held up as an inheritor of eternal life because he accepted Jesus as his personal savior, said a prayer, joined the church or was baptized.  He is held up as one who enters eternal life because he loved the neighbor.

When will our theology catch up to Jesus' teaching?

It's a beautiful, formula free day in God's world, be sure to do the good to your neighbor.  Who is your neighbor?  hmmm...

What must I do to inherit eternal life?
Do this and you will live.

OH NO!!!

OH NO!!!

I had been up for a couple of hours.  I decided it was time for breakfast.  In the past few months I have been loving the crunchy raisin bran and 2% milk.  Mmmm...

So to entertain myself, I turn on the news.  OH NO!!!  Flights are cancelled.  It is so tragic.  400 flights are cancelled!!!  Then I asked myself.  How many domestic flights are there each day in the US?

45,000

45,000?  Oh, wait, maybe it is not tragic.  That is less than 1% cancellations.  Sure it is tragic if it is a plane you are scheduled on, but hasn't that happened to all of us at one time or another?

This shouldn't even be in the news.  I get so tired of the media trying to keep people all worked up.  Why can't we all just enjoy our raisin bran and enjoy the day.

We can... and it begins with the choice to see the good.  Turn off the news.  Become good news to your neighbor.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

I have loved sleeping

In the past few months, I have loved sleeping at night.

That probably sounds strange, but it is true.  I think that I got my body out of kilter with too many pills.  Pills for the stomach, for the aches and pains, for regularity, for cholesterol, for whatever.  And add to that a few beers.

Now, on the advice of the doctor, take that all away, and man I have been sleeping better.  Much better.

It is like when the stuff that gets in our way, gets out of the way, we return to our normal, healthy selves.

Ahhhhhhh... a moment of clarity.  I believe that this is true with our brain/heart/mind/soul as well.  Remove the unhealthy parts, the unhealthy thoughts, and the original good will rise to the top.  Cut the weights off of the balloons and they will rise.  Remove the guilt, find the joy.  Remove the worry, find the peace.

I am sleeping better these days!!!

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

complaining

I am not sure that much good comes from complaining.  There are so many ways to be constructive about things.  Why be negative???

My friend Mike sent me this cartoon, and I loved it.

It's a beautiful, complaint free day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

A letter to a friend

I share this with you because it took me 18 years to send it.

Roger was my best friend when we lived in Princeton, in north Missouri.  When we took the appointment at Woods Chapel in Lees Summit it dramatically changed our relationship because we went from seeing each other 4x per week to 4x over the next 15 years.

Here is the letter than I penned to him in 2004 and finally delivered in 2022.

January 5, 2004

Dear Roger,

I am not sure where to begin, but I have felt compelled write to you for some time.

I have felt terrible for years about the fact that we moved away from Princeton and that our move helped spell the end of-change in our friendship.

Roger, I want to take a moment to honor a friendship that was remarkable. Up until that point in my life, I had never had a friend that even began to tough what I had with you. I want you to know that. To that point in my life, I had never had a friend like you were to me.

I don’t know that I would say that we are no longer friends, but we just don’t stay in touch and I feel badly about that.

I am hopeful that God is blessing your life. I know that your family has grown. Mine has too. “Yeah Roger” Scott will be 13 next month. Jenny is 15 next month and Alli has a job and is driving.

Cathy works for a company that audits medical records. I assume that she is still a lousy bridge player, but since we never play anymore, no one really knows.

I finally quit smoking.

Peggy Roberts got cancer a few years ago and died. John remarried.

Our church has grown a ton in the last 10 years. 750 on Sunday morning. We have 8 men’s softball teams. I have many friends, some of which are very dear. God has blessed us.

But. Every time I think about Princeton, I think about you. And I remember how I feel responsible for the changes that took place. I am sincerely sorry for that.

Roger, what we had was special, and you are a great guy. I honor you, and thank you for your friendship.

Happy New Year

Jeff Brinkman


On the positive side, Roger and Jeff have reconnected.  I have seen him 8 times in the past year.  That has been great.  It has been fantastic to have him back in my life.
If you need to send a letter to a friend, don't wait 22 years to do it.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

To be alive

To be alive is to look at something and care. The world is full of people that look and don’t care. The world is also full of people that barely even see the broken man lying on the side of the road. 

To be alive it to wake up!!!  It is to see people as valuable.  It is to get off of auto-pilot and care about every person that you meet.  God needs more people that see and care for the broken in this world, and not just the broken.  God needs people that see people, all people.  All of them are valuable and deserving of our love and compassion.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see, to SEE, TO SEE...

Happy Birthday

Today if I wake up, I am 65 years old.

Wow... how the time has flown by.

At 25 I was in seminary.  At 35 I was an ordained minister.  At 45 and 55 I was raising children and pastoring at Woods Chapel.

The last ten years have seen some massive changes.  Changes to my career, to the proximity of my friends, to my list of beliefs [the list has gotten shorter.]  Changes to my body.  Changes to how I think.

These days, I am having more good days than not.  Mostly because I am taking better care of myself, and I work hard at seeing the good.  

I no longer think in terms of what the next ten years will hold.  I no longer take it for granted that I will be here ten years from now.  I tend to think more day to day.  Day by day.  Each day, if I wake up... see the good and show kindness to every person that I can.

I hope to do that today, and if I can, then it will surely be a happy birthday.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

Christians first

We are Christians first, Americans second.  I pray for an America that is more kind and gracious, and Christians should be showing the way.

What would Jesus do?  Jesus set the example of inclusion, love, kindness, grace, mercy and compassion.  These characteristics should be the shining marks of Jesus followers.  If you are a part of a church that does not teach inclusion, love, kindness, grace and compassion, is this really a church of Christ?

Jesus never shamed a sinner.  We are all sinners.  Jesus never argued about homosexuality.  Jesus had both Republicans and Democrats [of the time] as his disciples.  He treated them all, he treated everyone with dignity.  Christ followers follow his example.

Happy Birthday America.  We were all very fortunate to be born here.  May we give back to our country the character traits that make for a truly Christian world.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

healthy emotions

I had a long talk the other night with an old friend about what makes emotions healthy or unhealthy.  Here is a summary...

Emotions are normal and good.  To not have them is weird, and not human.  Emotions become toxic when we use them to hurt others, guilt others, or to hurt ourselves.  They become toxic when instead of leading us in healthy ways [to more compassion] they lead us to unhealthy, selfish, angry behavior.  Toxic emotions can lead to unhealthy boundaries.

May we all be blessed with healthy emotions and lots of compassion.  May we also be careful to check our emotions with our brains.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

A steelworker again

I have a good friend that owns a steel company.  From time to time, I get to go be a steel worker.  It doesn't happen very often, so when it does, I find it very exciting.  These pictures are from a Tennessee Valley Authority project from about two weeks ago.

my friend made this steel grating.

putting the pieces together

man of steel

hard hats need cool stickers!!!

giant duct work built by my friend

cool trucks!!!

Big trucks, big cranes, the noise of men and machines at work.  Giant erector sets in the hands of grown men.

Oh what fun!!!

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

it's a big world

I am prejudiced of course, but I love this picture.  This is my grand daughter Bella-D frolicking in her backyard.  I zoomed in on her.  For now, her life is protected.  She is the biggest thing in her parents' life.    Mom or Dad is "eyes on" 24 hours a day.  But the day will come when she realizes that the world is a much bigger place.

This is the whole picture.  Oh, what a big world it is!!!  

When we are young, we have no idea what is in store.  We have no idea what challenges, what opportunities, or what decisions lie ahead.  Life has it's pitfalls and it's frightening moments, but life is also big and beautiful and wonderful.

Oh, for the days when we frolicked carefree in the backyard!!!

It's a big beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.