Timothy.

Lately, I have been reading through Paul’s letters to Timothy. People smarter than me say that Paul’s second letter to Timothy was probably the last letter he ever wrote. This means that Paul, writing from prison and soon to be martyred, chose to spend his last ounces of leadership, experience, and love on mentoring this young man.

Timothy is just a young man trying to lead a church. Leading a body of people – a church – is difficult enough. I can imagine how much more difficult it would be to lead so many older people. A commentator in one of my Bibles notes how “Timothy’s young age made him an easy target for those who preferred a seasoned leader.” I’m sure it’s no different today. And I’m sure that Timothy yanked this letter from the messenger’s hands and scoured it for every word, every bit of guidance he could receive from his wise, experienced mentor.

Lest the connection be missed, I want to make a few things clear. I am 25 years old. I grew up in the church, and I walked away as soon as I had the choice. A few years later, I decided to return – or was drawn into returning – back to church. Now, I love the Church. I would die for the Church. But since I probably won’t have to do that in my time, I will give the life I am given to the Church.

Is this too intense for a Wednesday morning? My friends have confided that I am too intense sometimes, and I have though about this for about a year. This is what I have decided.

Now is the time for intensity. Do you see what I see? Can you simultaneously hold a picture in your mind of all the people the church has hurt standing beside all the damaged people Christ is transforming through the church? In my life, I have seen church at its worst. And I have seen church at our best. I believe it is my mission to do everything in my power to lead us into the best that Christ has called us to be. And I believe this mission calls for intense love.

But this is scary. I’m too young. I’m too inexperienced. I’m too uneducated. I’m too broken. So I fall on my knees and I pray. I pray that Christ will break me even more, because it isn’t my success that will restore the Church. It is our brokenness. And so if you are my friend and you are close to my age, I’m sorry. I pray for you to be broken, too. I want you to have a broken heart, because I believe that is the beginning of having a heart like Christ. In Gethsemane, he sweated blood for us. Jesus surely smiled many times in his life. But at the climax of his life, he wasn’t smiling. He was broken and he was intense. So this is what I pray for you, my young friends.

And if you are one of my older friends, I pray that you see what Paul has done at the climax of his life. He invested his last remaining days on earth to a young church leader named Timothy. Paul was now counting on Timothy the way that Christ had counted on Paul. Likewise, I want you to count on me. Not because of anything I have done, but because it seems to be Christ’s joy to pass on what he has received from the Father. So that you can pass it on to me. And I will pass it on to others.

Like Paul, our days are numbered. I beg you not to spend the rest of your life pursuing temporary comfort or money or things but the one thing that we know lasts forever. I beg you to let your heart be broken over the things that break God’s heart. You may suffer, but you will have no regrets.

with nothing but love,

a young shepherd.