Responsibilities don't go away when you have a problem.
This week, two years ago, I am waiting to hear if my lung problems are fungus. When is the doctor's office going to call? Waiting is lots of fun.
In addition to what ever problem you are facing in life, your other responsibilities still call your name. You may have a sick child, a dying parent, or a bad medical diagnosis yourself. You still have to keep the rest of your life afloat. On Tuesday, September 20th, 2005, we were in the middle of a capital funds drive titled "prepare the way." We were planning to build a youth/missions building and expand our foyer. I met with leaders of the campaign during the day and the consultant came in that night for one of several church wide meetings. Life must go on.
There are two kinds of fungus. The doctor calls. It is not the one kind of fungus. The other test will be in tomorrow. Pray that it is the other kind of fungus now.
I am really depressed. I have pinned my hopes on fungus. Lots of questions. Lots of doubts. When you are the preacher, you are not supposed to have questions and doubts. You are supposed to be "up" all the time and you are supposed to have the answers.
I don't feel like a very good Christian. I pray, "God, please can it be the other kind of fungus?" Tomorrow we will know. "Just wait, one more day, it will be fungus," I tell myself.
September 20th, 2005. That was then, this is now. Thank God.
Its a beautiful day in God's world. Be sure to see the good.
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2 comments:
Dear Jeff,
I wonder if we look at this now as a test of our faith? Abraham was tested, I believe, so that Abraham knew the depth of his faith. Are we also?
Are we able now to thank God for bad knees, and death of brothers and gasping for breath, because it drives us to God?
Amen, so be it...
Jeff,
One of the reasons I was drawn to this Church family, called to join the congregation, was a connection I made with you. I would not have made that connection if I felt you
were a person who never had questions or doubts. If you were truely "up" all the time I would question that. I am touched by your willingness to share this personal time of your life and am thankful that you here for us.
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