Sunday, July 17, 2011

my space

I have space.  Personal space.  It's mine, and I wish more people would respect it.  My space is this feeling that I have about not wanting to be crowded or interfered with.  Now if it is starting to sound selfish, well it probably is.  My space is based on my feelings and does not take into consideration what you may feel about your space.

When i really need to get on the elevator and the door opens, and it is already pretty full, my brain says, make space for me.  If you are on the elevator and someone like me crowds in, you may be feeling that I am in your space.  Sorry.  My space is about me.  I imagine that yours is too.

I notice this phenomenon the most when I am at a crowded place like an athletic event, a concert or the airport.  Everyone is going somewhere and they are in a hurry.  There are no lines on the road and no traffic signs, so everyone goes every which way they can.  None of them realize that they are getting in my way. 

Why did that person just cut me off?  Don't they realize that I was going that way?  Couldn't they see that I was on a certain trajectory?  Come on, get with the program.  Don't you know that I am the queen bee?  Make room for me.

Maybe such encounters is why shy people like me actually prefer to stay away from big crowds.  That's why I like the Royals games.  Shy people don't force their way onto elevators.  They walk a little slower and keep an eye out for the crazy drivers at the airport.  When I slow down, it helps me keep my space to myself, which keeps me in my comfort zone.

And about the time I am totally feeling peaceful, walking along behind someone at a sweet and comfortable clip, well they just stop.  They just stop.  They just stop.  For no reason, maybe they just realized that they forgot something.  Maybe they realized that their flight is actually tomorrow.  But they just stop.  I jam on the brakes.  I give them the look.  They don't even notice.  My goodness man, you did not just do that.  You did not just stop!  What is wrong with you?

My space.  It is constantly getting violated.  And so, I enjoy the morning.  The quiet.  A few moments to write and think and pray before the onslaught of humanity comes crashing into my elevator or cutting me off it traffic.  Enjoy the quiet times.  With the population on the rise, they are sure to be fewer and farther in between.

It's a beautiful day in God's world, be sure to see the good.

4 comments:

Sharon said...

I could totally relate to everything you said until you wrote, "that's why I like the Royals games". Are you saying that the crowd at the Royals games are the shy type too and they're all giving each other space or what? I was out there a week ago and I was about ready to pull my hair out!! My pet peeve is people that are on MY side--walking toward me. My brain says in the USA you keep to the right--don't come walking straight at me and expect me to get out of YOUR way. But, I am always the one that moves--I never liked playing the game "chicken"--especially in one of these walking situations. It's very uncomfortable.

In the future, I will make sure that I respect YOUR space. And I would appreciate it if you would stay on your own side of the hallway. ; )

Anonymous said...

Shy? You? I would never have described you as shy. And you give good hugs, so I think you welcome people into your space . . . at least sometimes :)

Anonymous said...

I caught the Royals comment and loved it. No crowds there. And welcome to the fraternal order of Space Cadets (well maybe not in the sense that some would use that term.) I love my space, and I don't think God expects me to feel guilty about it. I actually find it to be the kind of renewing and refreshing that God gives us, as strength when it's time to wade back into the crowds and minister to those he puts in our path. So keep spacing. I plan to. As the saying goes "I met God in the morning, when the day was at its best."

Anonymous said...

Jeff, the reply from one of your readers today brings up a good point. I think that what many people don't realize is that some of the most shy people there are, are stage performers and entertainers. I have never quit missing Johnny Carson's show, and don't really think there's been a talent as good as him, in his field, since he left Tonight. Johnny was very much an introvert, and actually very shy, once he left that stage. In his retirement he continued to pursue keeping his private life. Although you are so demonstratively loving and shake lots of hands and give hugs to your congregation, I thoroughly understand the introverted, shy side. When you see an introverted/shy person put themselves on the line for doing what normally isn't comfortable for them, like you do, I think it only speaks of great compassion for your congregation.

God bless you for loving no your congregation like you do, even when quiet would feel better.